Marc Hauser on Building Resilience

Building boys’ resilience can help them thrive, says Marc Hauser.

Even if they’ve experienced a lot of adversity.

“Adversity experienced by children is not a rare event, but a relatively common event,” says Marc, author of Vulnerable Minds: The Harms of Childhood Trauma & the Hope of Resilience. Adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) may include abuse, violence, neglect, poverty, and loss of a caregiver, and these experiences can negatively affect kids’ development.

But although research linking ACEs to behavioral problems and decreased academic achievement has been around for more than two decades, many adults still do not understand that adverse experiences may be at the root of children’s behavioral issues. Boys who act up (or out) at school, at home, or in the community are frequently met with punishment, not understanding.

Shifting your mindset from What’s wrong with you? to What happened to you? What’s happening? can be “transformative,” Marc says.

The 5 Ts (& How They Impact ACEs)

All adverse experiences are not equal. There are 5 Ts that can impact a child’s adverse experiences:

Type – Poverty may impact a child differently than sexual abuse or loss of a caregiver, for instance.

Tenure – How long is the child exposed to the adverse experience? Is it relatively fleeting, or a persistent issue over many months or years?

Timing – When, during the child’s development, did they experience an adverse event? Some ACEs are particularly impactful if they occur during specific phases of development.

Toxicity — This describes the severity of the event. Broadly speaking, severe physical abuse is typically more impactful than mild physical abuse.

Turbulence – How unpredictable and uncontrollable is the event?